Monday, June 20, 2011

Battle of the Bug

With the onset of another promising summer I have now become the ungracious host to many of Gods smaller, creepier creations. My personal feelings towards these minuscule yet surprisingly hardy little creatures are indeed complicated and I'll simply say with the utmost sincerity..."Bless their little hearts". This of course is stated while I reach for the closest form of hand held death whether it be in the form of a shoe, paper towel, liquid bleach, or (my personal favorite) the vacuum cleaner.

In fact after a weeks struggles with the sugar loving critters I have come to the conclusion that God understood the large portion of a woman's life that would be spent pushing around the vacuum cleaner. Therefore in an attempt to squelch a complete animosity towards this house hold appliance, He allowed us to discover its second and more rewarding application. The quick and clean dispatchment of any bug who dare invade our hollowed food preparation grounds. Believe it or not this whole experience has been quite inspirational and with a renewed vigor I decided to turn to the renowned words of Mrs. Dunwoody to discover some tried and true all natural insect remedies. I hope you find these tips helpful and to all tired house wives... I bid you... good bug killing!

Cockroach Chasers

Mix 4 tablespoons of borax of boric acid, 2 tablespoons of flour, and 1 tablespoon of cocoa power. Set out in open containers in the kitchen away from children and pets. For a simpler solution, sprinkle borax in cockroach paths. Cockroaches, unlike some of the people who have them, are very clean; as the preen themselves, they will ingest any boric acid that is sticking to them.

Cucumber in an effective cockroach chaser. The vegetable has a naturally occurring repellent that cockroaches avoid.

Though it is untested a combination of 1/2 cup baking soda with 1 tablespoon of powdered sugar is theorized to make cockroaches explode. Can any one say "science fair project"?

The ants go marching one by one

To deter ants, make sure your kitchen shelves are wiped down well, free from any food remains. Wash the shelves with salt and water. Mint tea, citrus juice, salt, cinnamon, garlic, and boric acid are also good at repelling ants.

To destroy a ants nest, mix 1 part confectioners sugar with 1 part borax. Sprinkle the mixture over a piece of wood near the nest. The sugar will attract the ants, and the borax will poison them. Pouring boiling hot water over an ant mound is also effective and a little easier.

Good night, sleep tight, don't let the... yikes!
In case you haven't heard there has been a severe out break of bed bugs across our country. Many a devout craigslist shopper is weeping in dispair as it has become down right dangerous to part take of those tantalizing second hand furniture deals. Though this recipe is a little odd I felt it my duty to include it considering the higher then usual demand.

Add a thimbleful of quicksilver to the white of an egg; beat until well mixed; apply with a feather to the bedclothes upon rising. Quicksilver? Feather? Upon rising? I'm pretty sure that the odds of me burning my furniture and sleeping on the floor are higher but for all you ambitious people good luck!


Dab lavender oil on our pulse points. Yes ladies, now you can beg your hubby for that expensive lavender perfume with the valid argument that its for the sake of your health!

Rats last supper

Mix equal amounts of powdered cement and flour. Set next to a pan of water. Though this does not usually appeal to house hold pets you might consider a different option if "poopsie" is a particularly adventurous eater.

I offer up my thanks to "Mrs. Dunwoodys excellent instructions for homekeeping". I have been thoroughly educated and can't wait to try out some of the bug deterring recipes.... Bless their little hearts.


  1. Ahh! I love it! haha this was great Miko!

  2. Hehe Thanks! It was a moment of venting after I scrubbed my kitchen for the thousandth time!